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"The Mall Santa!" is the 1,084th episode of SML Movies.

Synopsis[]

Marvin gets a job as a Mall Santa!

Plot[]

The video starts with Jeffy, telling Marvin that he finished writing his Christmas list for Santa Claus. Marvin tells Jeffy he's 20 and he doesn't think Santa gives him gifts anymore, which causes Jeffy to scream outloud while Rose tells Marvin "He does", causing Marvin to say "Okay fine, he does" as he then says he'll give him the list later, but Jeffy insists on wanting Marvin to take him to the mall so he can give the list to Santa. Marvin agrees to take him, saying he'll take him later as Jeffy then leaves, saying he's going to the bathroom to practice in the mirror. Jeffy is then heard,screaming "Holy reindeer shit! It's actually him!" while Rose tells Marvin she doesn't know how they are going to afford any of the Christmas presents that Jeffy listed on his list, which Marvin says yeah as he says they don't have any money, and Christmas is 2 weeks away, meaning they can't get a job by then. Marvin then says "Let's just watch TV" as he turns on the TV, where the News comes on, with Mr. Goodman reporting about a nationwide Mall Santa shortage. After the News, Rose tells Marvin that they are hiring Mall Santas, which Marvin comments on it, saying "Oh look at that" as Rose tells him he could do that, but Marvin says he can't be a Mall Santa as he says he's not fat, he doesn't have white hair, and he doesn't wear glasses, but Rose tells Marvin that he could totally do it as he would make so many of kids happy. Marvin then sighs as he says he guess he can do it as he says he needs a job, and they have to afford of the gifts on Jeffy's Christmas list as Marvin and Rose then goes over some of the gifts Jeffy asked for. After they looked it over, Marvin tells Rose that he's going to go apply for the job, but he doesn't think he's going to get it as Marvin then leaves.

The video then cuts to Marvin, wearing a Santa outfit, along with other people. David then comes in, welcoming them to Mall Santa Bootcamp, or what some people have called it, Hell. David says he is the head elf, but they can call him David, which one of the Santas wave, and says "Hi David". David then talks about how it's his job to inspect the Mall Santas to make sure they are not out there, acting like a bunch of bums, and making Santa look bad because if kids don't believe they are Santa, then they aren't going to believe in the real Santa, and if they don't believe in the real Santa, he dies. He then tells them that to make sure they understand him, they all going to say "Ho Ho Ho Sir", which they all say it, but off sync, causing David to question what was that as he tells them to do it again, but with him, which they all say it, except David finishes before them, which David questions how did he finish before them as he then says "Let's see what we're working with" as he goes over each Mall Santa, critiquing each one, which he tells one to "Get the fuck out of here" because of them failing to say their name is Santa, and wearing shoes that have one of their toes sticking out. After David finishes critiquing the Mall Santas, he tells them to listen up as he asks them how many are Registered Offenders, which two of the Mall Santas raise their hands, which David says it's two more then he like as he then points to a Mall Santa, and tells them they answered way too quick as he then goes to a Mall Santa, and asks them what did he do, which he said he had an Ice Cream truck one time, and he had to go to the bathroom, so he went out the back, and started to take a pee, when a little kid saw it, so he gave him Ice Cream so he would be quiet. David then says "And he wasn't quiet wasn't he", which the Mall Santa nods no as David then says he's fine as he goes to the next Mall Santa to ask him what they do, which he said one time when he did work at Santa, he had a kid on his left knee, and their "hot ass" mom on his right knee, which he got a "chubby" while the kid was there, so it was a "whole thing" according to him. David asks to see the mom, which the Mall Santa pulls out his phone and shows David the picture of the mom, which David enjoys it as he says he gets it and he understands. David was about to say they can work with it until he gets something on his phone, which he looks at it and says Santa's coming, so he tells them to look alive and act "Santa as fuck" as he tells them to give him a "Ho Ho Ho", which they give him it as Santa Claus then comes in, which he says "Ho Ho Holy shit, what do we have here" as he tells a Mall Santa to stand up as he notices one of them squatting. Santa then tells David to come to him as David and Santa then start talking, which Santa makes a claim about how David hates him despite David saying he doesn't hate him, and how his family is "cooked". Santa then tells David they'll talk later as he asks the Mall Santas "Who's ready to go to the mall, make some kids happy", which they all say they are as Santa tells them if they make him look bad, he'll kill their family. Santa then says "All right, let's go make some kids happy", but all the Mall Santas just stand there. Santa then asks if they are all deaf as he then says "David!?", which causes David to tell the Mall Santas to go, which all the Mall Santa proceed to go to the mall as Santa then tells David that he's sticking a candy cane up his ass, which David then says he understands.

At the Mall, Marvin admires how Christmassy it is. Brooklyn T. Guy then comes in, dressed as an elf, which he says "Time to meet the new asshole Santa" as he says "Hey buddy, ready to hate your life" before noticing that the new Mall Santa is Marvin, which he gets excited, saying "Marvin is that you?", which Marvin says it is him. Brooklyn Guy says it's so cool how they get to work together in the North Pole. Marvin tells him he just needed a quick job to make money before Christmas, which Brooklyn Guy tells Marvin not to worry as the job is super easy as he explains to him that all he needs to do is sit in the chair, and then kids come sit on his lap and tell him what they want for Christmas, and he says "Okay" and then he hands them a candy cane, and then they leave, which he says it's like cake. Marvin asks if that is it, which Brooklyn Guy tells him that sometimes he gets shit on as sometimes, the kids shit on him, and they call them "Poopers", but Brooklyn Guy tells Marvin not to worry about it as he says he can spot them a mile away as he then says he has nothing to worry about. Marvin then sits down as Brooklyn Guy says "Okay kids, welcome to Santa's Winter wonderland in JC Pennys", which Mikey, Jeffy, and a girl get very excited. Jeffy says "Holy reindeer shit, it's fuckin him", only for Brooklyn Guy to tell him no cussing in the North Pole, but Jeffy ignores him as he says "Fuck!". Marvin tells Jeffy no cussing, which shocks Jeffy as he says "He knows my name, He knows my name!" as Brooklyn Guy then asks who's first, which Mikey comes in first, which he sits on Marvin's lap so hard, it hurts him as he says "Oh my god, he sat on my balls, he sat on my balls", but Brooklyn Guy tells him not to talk about his balls near the kids while Mikey questions Marvin about his realness and why his mustache a different color from his beard. After this, Marvin asks Mikey what he wants for Christmas, which Mikey says he wants his dad to stop hitting him, which Marvin tells him he doesn't think it's going to happen, but Mikey says he's a good boy. Marvin tells him ok as he asks if there is anything else he would like, which Mikey says he wants a Xbox, a PS5, a Boat, a Pony, and a Monster Truck. Marvin then says "How about a candy cane" as Brooklyn Guy pulls out a candy cane and hands it to Mikey, which Mikey gets excited as he then says "What about for my dad to stop hitting me", to which Marvin says maybe next year, which disappoints Mikey, Marvin then tells Mikey to get up and move as the other kids are waiting, but Mikey refuses as he says "Nooo, my Santa" along with how he's never moving, which Marvin tells Brooklyn Guy to get him off him, but Brooklyn Guy says he can't as only the kid's parents can touch him. Marvin asks Mikey where's his dad, which Mikey says his dad left him at the Mall, 4 hours ago, to go to the bar to get some hookers. Brooklyn Guy facepalms himself as he tells Marvin that's what they call child abandonment, which he says is pretty common. Marvin continues telling Brooklyn Guy to get Mikey off him, which Brooklyn Guy tells him to hold on as he gets out pepper spray, which he asks Mikey if he wants some peppermint spray, which Mikey excitedly says yes. Brooklyn Guy then tells him to open his eyes, which Mikey says "Okay!" as he gets closer to the pepper spray, which Brooklyn Guy then sprays it on his face, causing Mikey to cry in pain from the pepper spray as he then runs off while Marvin asks Brooklyn Guy if he just pepper sprayed the kid, but Brooklyn Guy tells him they don't have time for that as they get paid $7 an hour. Brooklyn Guy then says "Let's get going" as he then yells out "Next kid!", which is Jeffy. Jeffy gets excited as he says "Fuck yeah" to himself, but Rose tells him to calm down. Jeffy then says "Fuck that mommy, I'm going to sit on Santa Claus's lap" as he leaps onto Marvin's lap, hurting Marvin. Brooklyn Guy then yells out "Pooper" as Jeffy then shits on Marvin, which Marvin tells Jeffy to stop as Jeffy then gets up and says "Who gets to say they shit on Santa Claus's lap" as he raises his hand and says "Right here". Rose then tells Jeffy to tell Santa what he wants for Christmas, which Jeffy says he wants a box of Cheerios that is the size of his house. Marvin then says "How about a candy cane!" as Brooklyn Guy pulls out a candy cane and hands it to Jeffy. Jeffy then says "Shove it" as he shoves the candy cane up his noise while Marvin tells Jeffy it's time to go, but Jeffy refuses to leave, which upsets Marvin as he tells him not to do it again while he tells Brooklyn Guy not to pepper spray him as he says it's his son. Marvin repeats again that he has to go, but Jeffy says "Let's see who you really are" as he pulls on the top of Marvin's Santa beard, revealing that he's not Santa, which upsets Jeffy as he cries. Rose then says "Jeffy come on, let's go home" as they leave while Marvin gets his Santa beard fixed by Brooklyn Guy.

Marvin then yells out "Next kid", which a little girl comes by as she says she is so excited as she was about to sit on Marvin's lap, but gets pushed by Duggie, telling her to get out of his way, which Marvin sees this as he tells Duggie to get to the back of the line, which Duggie finds it racist as he says "Man that is Racist, Santa Clawps", but Marvin tells Duggie that he skipped the little girl, which Duggie says he didn't under Finders Keepers, but Marvin says no as he asks how's it Finders Keepers, which Duggie says it's because he found the spot in the line, so he gets to keep it. Marvin then says "Okay fine" as he asks him what he wants for Christmas, but Duggie says he just wanted to ask if he is on the good boy list or on the bad boy list, which Marvin tells him he's on the bad boy list for pushing a little girl and skipped her in the line, which Duggie tries to lie, saying it was his cousin, but Marvin tells him he saw him do it, which Duggie says it wasn't him, but what he wants for Christmas, he wants bail money for his cousin DooDoo Ass as he explains what he did was he hired a hitman named "Luigi Margerini" and he killed somebody, which is why he needs the bail money for his cousin, but Marvin tells him they don't do that, so Duggie tells him he wants then a Hellcat that is paid off in his name, but Marvin tells him they also don't do that, so Duggie tells him he wants then two $110,000 KFC gift cards, but Marvin tells him they don't make those either as Brooklyn Guy tells Marvin to just say yes as he claims he doesn't know he's not getting the stuff he asked for, resulting in Marvin saying "Okay you're getting all that stuff", which excited Duggie as he thanks him. He then asks for a candy cane, which Brooklyn Guy pulls one out and hands it to him, only for Duggie to ask another one for his cousin to suck on to make it a pick to pick the lock in jail, which Brooklyn Guy gets out another one and hands it to Duggie. Duggie then asks for a Hershey's Kiss, which Brooklyn Guy gets one out and tosses it at Duggie, which Duggie tries to ask for more, but Brooklyn Guy says he can only have one. Duggie then says before he go, he wanted to know if they have $20, but both Marvin and Brooklyn Guy tell him to get out, which Duggie says he needs the food court, only for Marvin and Brooklyn Guy to tell him to go, causing Duggie to leave, feeling sad. Brooklyn Guy then announces that Santa is taking a 5-minute break, which makes the little girl feel sad as she says "But Santa" only for Brooklyn Guy to tell her she's going to have to wait. Marvin asks if they can take a break, which Brooklyn Guy says he has to take a piss as he then leaves while Marvin tells the little girl to stay where she's at. David then comes in to ask Marvin how being Santa is going, which Marvin says it's going good as he tells him they are taking a quick break but they're handing out candy canes. David says it's great as he asks Marvin if he pepper sprayed a kid, which Marvin says that wasn't him, and it was the elf that helping him as Mikey runs back in, saying "There he is, that's the one, that's the guy that pepper sprayed me and told me my dad would never stop hitting him and called me a bad boy", which upsets David as he tells Marvin "That's not very Santa like is it", which Marvin says "Uh no" as David says he's going to die as Santa shoots David at the back of the head, saying "Sorry David". Santa then says "Marvin" as he reloads his gun and says he's next, but Marvin says he didn't do anything, and it was an elf that did it. Santa then asks "What elf", which Marvin points and says the elf's right there as Brooklyn Guy comes back, telling Marvin he's sorry he's late as the girl at Chick-Fil-A had "rocking cans" and he would Jingle her bells as he then notices Santa, which he runs off while Santa chases him, saying "Get back here boy" Marvin says "Oh thank god I can get out of here" as he runs out of the mall.

The video then cuts to Brooklyn Guy, running inside to his house as he then closes and locks the front door to his house. Brooklyn Guy then sighs in relief as he says it was close as he then sits down on his couch, which Karen asks Brooklyn Guy how was work, which Brooklyn Guy tells her it was the usual, being crying kids. Karen notices that Brooklyn Guy is still in his elf costume as she asks if he wants to roleplay. Brooklyn Guy questions what he is gonna roleplay, which Karen tells him that maybe she's a broken toy and he's gonna fix her, which confused Brooklyn Guy as he says "With my penis? how does that even work?", which Karen says it can be a tinkertoy, but Brooklyn Guy threatens to divorce her if she calls it a tinkertoy again. Karen then notices something from the window, which she asks Brooklyn Guy who's at the window, which Brooklyn Guy turns around and sees Santa, telling Brooklyn Guy to come outside, which Karen asks if it's Santa, but Brooklyn Guy tells her to let him see as he goes to the window, and closes the blinds, saying it's nothing. Karen then says she swears it was Santa outside, but Brooklyn Guy says she's a broken toy, and broken toys don't talk as he then says "Let's go to the bedroom", which excites Karen as they then go to their bedroom, where the video cuts to Karen, tells Brooklyn Guy it was amazing and that she was pretending he was Ethan Slater, and she was Ariana Grande, which disgusts Brooklyn Guy. Karen then tells Brooklyn Guy "Good night Boiney" as she then goes to sleep while Brooklyn Guy turns around and sees Santa on the bed, which Santa points his gun as Brooklyn Guy as he says "Two seconds, that's pathetic" as he says he only comes once a year and he lasts longer than that, which Brooklyn Guy says "Ok" as Santa tells him not to piss him off again, which Brooklyn Guy promises he won't piss him off again as Santa then gets off of the bed.

Characters[]

Trivia[]

Errors[]

  • In the description, "Mall Santa" isn't capitalized. Additionally, Santa is misspelled as "Sanrta"
  • When Brooklyn Guy is wearing the elf costume, he has legs, despite him not having legs in the first place.
  • The second behind the scenes video is just named "Mall Santa" instead of the original video's name.

Poll[]

To see full results of this poll, see here.

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