Board Thread:Ideas and Alternative Endings/@comment-34595515-20190118135330

CROSS-ing Over Shorts!

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Episode 5 - The Scar!

Synopsis: Murder Man asks Badman why he has a scar on his eye and Badman decides to explain why!

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At a hidden warehouse, Badman and the other villains are playing a game of poker.

SMG3: Ok! I got a queen of hearts! Anyone else?

Badman: I got one!

Nancy: Same!

Invertosis: Same!

Murder Man: Same here!

Ice Man: Me and Spider Man got one!

SMG3: Ok. So Nancy, Mega Maid and Firestar have to give up their money.

Firestar: DARN IT!

Firestar burns her deck of cards.

Badman: Anyways, next round-

Murder Man: Actually, Badman. I have a question!

Badman: What is it?

Murder Man: Why is there a scar on your eye?

Badman: Well, here’s how it happened-

THE END

Murder Man: NO! NO! NO!

Murder Man rips off the End card and rips it to shreds.

Murder Man: Continue!

Badman: Ok! Here’s how!

A flashback begins. Goodman is seen driving in his Lamborghini as he checks his phone for any house payments due.

Goodman: Ok. Just got to go to Onion Cream’s house and then I’m done for today!

Suddenly, Goodman crashes into a black Lamborghini.

Goodman: Sorry about that!

A person gets out of the car and it turns out to be Badman.

Badman: WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY CAR?!

Goodman: It was an accident, Brother! I was just looking though house payments!

Badman: Well, how would you like it if I did this?!

Badman grabs a crowbar and smashes Goodman’s windows.

Goodman: You son of a-

Badman lunges at Goodman, ripping off the car door in the process. Badman punches Goodman a few times before Goodman chokes him and kicks him off.

Badman: OW!

Goodman grabs the car door and hits Badman with it a couple times. Goodman then slams the window over Badman’s head breaking the glass. Badman hits Goodman before Goodman kicks him away. Junior, Joseph and Cody are at an ice cream truck.

Junior: I can’t wait to get some ice cream!

Joseph: Me too, dude-

Badman crashes into the truck.

Cody: IT’S BADMAN!

Junior: LET’S GET OUT OF HERE!

Junior, Joseph and Cody scream and run off as Badman gets up and enters the truck. Screwball the Clown falls out of the truck as Badman drives off and turns around to aim at Goodman.

Screwball: Hey! That was mine!

RH: Get the joke?

Goodman tries to run off, but Badman starts to catch up. Goodman grabs onto the front of the truck, breaks the window and punches Badman. Badman notices a soda truck in front of them and starts to accelerate on the gas hoping to crush Goodman against the truck.

Goodman: AH!

Goodman jumps to the side of the truck as it hits the soda truck, sending it swerving off of the road. However, one of the truck’s wheels break off and swerves off the road. The truck crashes into a building causing all of the ice cream to fall off. Junior, Joseph, Cody, Jeffy, Toad, Patrick and Atso rush to the pile of ice cream and eat them as Goodman and Badman exits the truck and continue the fight. They end up forcing each other into an alleyway. Badman slams Goodman’s face against the wall several times until Goodman pushes him away. Darth Vader spawns in with a time machine.

Darth Vader: Finally! I’ve rid the world of sand!

Darth Vader is sent flying off when Badman crashes into him. Goodman throws a trash can at Badman, but he dodges it. Goodman jumps at Badman and punch each other, but they accidentally activate the time machine and they are teleported away.

The Western Period.

A sheriff is seen on a horse carriage shooting at a bunch of Indians chasing him. Suddenly, Goodman and Badman teleport into the shootout and crash onto the sheriff knocking him off the carriage.

Sheriff: AHH!!!

Goodman and Badman continue fighting each other as many Indians jump into the carriage and join the fight. The fight ends up breaking part of the carriage sending part of it flying off a cliff as a bunch of Indians plummet to their deaths. Badman and Goodman continue fighting as the carriage starts to head towards a train. In front of the train is Scott Pilgrim driving the Delorean. The carriage crashes into the car, destroying it while Goodman and Badman end up on top of the Delorean where they continue fighting.

Scott: WHAT THE F***?!

Scott sends the DeLorean back in time as it nears the end of track and the train falls to the bottom of the chasm and explodes.

Back in the present.

The DeLorean arrives back in the present and parks at the side of the road, sending Goodman and Badman flying off. The two end up flying through a billboard of Onion Cream saying “Onion Cream lives large and kicks butt!” After crashing though it, the billboard collapses, creating a picture of a man’s buttocks and the phrase is changed to “Onion Cream licks butt!” The two crash onto the road and continue fighting each other. The two end up fighting into a building. The camera zooms out revealing the sign which says Dr. Finkleshitz’ Scientific Research Center. Goodman and Badman fight throughout the facility as many scientists run for their lives. The two end up crashing through the door to the clone research facility.

Dr. Finkleshitz: WHAT THE?!

Badman throws a potion at Goodman, but he dodges it and it hits Dr. Finkleshitz disintegrating him.

Goodman: STOP THIS, BROTHER!

Badman: YOU DESTROYED MY CAR!

Goodman: THERE WAS HARDLY A DENT ON IT!

Goodman and Badman continue fighting and they end up in one of the cloning machines and it activates. However, the machine goes haywire and it starts generating multiple Goodman and Badman clones fighting each other. A Goodman clone slams a Badman clone’s face into a machine, electrocuting him. Another Badman clone forces an electric circuit on a Goodman clone’s head electrocuting him. Eventually, a large explosion occurs, killing all of the clones and sending the real Goodman and Badman inside of the clone machine flying out of the lab as it explodes.

Astronauts are seen about to enter a rocket until they are crushed to death by the clone machine. Goodman and Badman exit. Goodman kicks Badman into the rocket and follows inside. The door closes and the rocket activates and flies into space. Both Goodman and Badman fall and land on the floor as the rocket flies out of the atmosphere. After Goodman and Badman get caught in the gravity, they continue their fight. Goodman punches Badman before Badman kicks Goodman in the crotch and a Goodman grabs Badman by the leg and throws him into a window before crashing into him, sending both of them into the control room. Goodman rips off the brake lever and hits Badman with it before sending Badman flying into the control panel, sending the rocket flying into a space satellite where it explodes. An astronaut screams as his head explodes from the lack of oxygen. Badman and Goodman continue fighting as the rocket flies back to Earth as it burns in the atmosphere.

Goodman: OH S***!

Goodman pukes and the vomit flies into Badman’s face.

Badman: EWW!!!

The rocket flies towards an oil rig and everyone evacuates before the rocket crashes into the oil rig, destroying both. Goodman and Badman exit and continue fighting. Badman slams Goodman’s face against some pipes until Goodman turns a valve and the pipe sprays Badman in the face with hot steam.

Badman: AGH!

While Badman is blinded, Goodman grabs a wrench and attacks Badman with it. Badman eventually grabs it and strikes Goodman with it, sending him flying into some barrels.

Goodman punches Badman, knocking him into some chains. Goodman pushes a lift lever sending Badman up to a crane. Goodman climbs onto a hook and pushes a button to follow Badman. Upon getting to the top, Goodman and Badman continue fighting. Badman knocks down Goodman, grabs a knife and puts in in a flame, causing it to glow red.

Badman: TIME TO DIE!

Goodman: NEVER!

Goodman kicks Badman, sending the knife flying into the air. The knife ends up landing on Badman’s left eye, burning it.

Badman: AGGHHH!!!

Badman throws the knife off the crane, and he now has a scar on his eye.

Badman: LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY EYE!

Goodman: You have done that yourself!

Goodman climbs onto a crane and attacks Badman. Goodman grabs a chain and starts to choke Badman. However, Badman puts his hand inside of a flame setting it on fire and scalds Goodman’s face with it.

Goodman: AH!!

While Goodman is blinded, Badman punches him several times. Goodman is eventually knocked onto the edge of the crane and Badman punches him repeatably. Badman grabs a nearby hook and attaches it to his hand to stab Goodman.

Badman: TIME TO DIE!

Goodman spots the button and reaches for it. Goodman eventually pushes it, causing the crane to move and Badman falls off the crane.

Badman: NNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!

The chain attached to Badman gets hung on a branch, hanging Badman. Badman tries to climb up, only for the chain to break and Badman falls and is impaled though the chest on another branch. Due to Badman’s weight, the branch bends down next to the rocket’s engine, igniting it and incinerating Badman. The entire oil rig starts to collapse.

Goodman: OH S***!

Goodman jumps off and lands in the ocean as the entire oil rig explodes into a mushroom cloud. Goodman swims back to the shore and walks away. Inside the ocean, Badman’s charred body floats in the wreckage of the oil rig. Suddenly, Badman opens his eyes and the flashback ends.

Badman: So that’s how I got the scar!

Murder Man: Nice! Also, if you got burned, how are you still alive?

Badman: 1 UP mushrooms.

Murder Man: Ok! Anyways, I’m guessing it’s now ok to finish right? Wait. Where’s the The End card?

Firestar: You ripped it apart. Remember?

Murder Man: Right.

Spider Man: Maybe I’ll try to remake it.

Spider Man makes a poorly made The End! An RH Studios Production card.

Nancy: That looks like a 2 year old made it!

Invertosis: Agree! 